She Said: The Abortion Debate

Dr. B. said he wanted to do a post on the Abortion Debate, which I thought was a good idea. But I have already written out my ideas in blog form, so I am just going to repeat the following post, which appeared at FMH back in April of 2007, and was actually written much earlier.

The Pro-Love Movement
No single issue has been as divisive of women as that of abortion. Its battle lines are so clear-cut; one is either pro-life or pro-choice. A change of opinion on the issue by a politician is tantamount to desertion and betrayal. Until this moment I did not even realize there was another option.

Until now I have been vociferously pro-life, have used all of the usual arguments, have seen all of the usual films, read the brochures, contributed to the organizations. Until, with a flash of clarity, I have finally decided: I can no longer affiliate myself with the “pro-life” movement.

Have I converted to “pro-choice?” An emphatic NO. I am now “pro-love.”

With all of my heart I believe in the existence of the soul of an unborn child. I have felt its stirrings within me. I have held my 3 pound, 13 ounce daughter in my arms and help her fight–and win–the battle to survive. I have also miscarried tiny, perfectly formed 12-week fetus. How can I support the freedom of choice to end this life-possibility?

However, with 5 children ages 7 and under, I have briefly glimpsed the feeling of emotional exhaustion that would cause a woman to feel that she could not provide for one more child. Because I have removed myself from the battle, I can now empathize with the woman who has conceived a child of rape–part herself and part horror. I can be touched by the plight of a child budding into womanhood whose life potential has been suddenly and drastically reduced by a tragic mistake.

I stand with my sister-woman on one side of the controversy as she views the rights of the unborn child and contends to save a small life. I stand with my sister-woman on the other side as she articulately expresses that the right to choose what we do with our bodies must not be taken away by a state or federal government. I love both women. I agree with both. The view is indeed different from atop the fence.

Because I believe my stance could never be legislated, I am done with one-issue politics. I find myself more free to consider the many policies of political candidates when I do not have to automatically accept or reject them because of their stand on abortion.

As a pro-love advocate, I no longer spend my energy on standing in front of abortion clinics, marching in Washington, angry debate. Instead, my efforts are focused on making a loving world where rapes are less likely to occur, where babies aren’t born addicted to drugs, where children don’t need to find their love in premarital sex. My efforts are focused on better health care, adoption and child placement possibilities, child support issues, education and job opportunities–solutions which might alleviate the need for abortions. In this world, every baby is a wanted baby.

I realize this is an idealistic view. But somehow we have to remove ourselves from the current battle over abortion which is now going on in the United States. Overturning Roe vs. Wade will solve nothing. People will continue to hold divergent opinions and the legality of abortion will flip-flop every few years as different parties gain political control. Roe vs. Wade is not a worthy goal for us as a country. We must set our sights higher. We must unite in a movement which will address the problem.

Until now, the middle of the road has had no name. The activists have been on either side of the issue. I hereby offer the “Pro-Love” movement. It’s an idea whose time has come. It’s an alternative to shooting the abortion doctor.

We need activists who will reach out with love to human beings with all idealogies in all situations. A pro-love world will take all the energy we can muster. We have none to waste on a war.